sadness

Well, yesterday my husband's deployment really set in. After about a month and a half of training down in Indiana, his group has finally shipped out and left the country. Up until now we've been able to have phone and internet contact every day. From this point on, that isn't going to be possible. He is going to be in a western European country (I'm supposed to be careful about what info I share on here.. ) for several weeks before they move on to Kosovo. While he is in country X, it is entirely likely that I will not hear from him at all until they reach their final destination.
This has made the deployment real at last and I'm afraid that the long delayed deployment depression is settling in.. Now, I usually get a bit of depression this time of year anyway.. I have seasonal depression, but I've got problems in the early spring instead of fall/winter.. (I've never been normal about anything apparently..) So this is hitting me really hard this year.. I know it's a temporary thing and will soon pass, but that doesn't make it any more fun to go through.
(Doesn't help either that I can't get a call back about any of the jobs I've been applying for.. I just want some part time work to earn a little extra cash and get out of the house once in a while.. I'm not looking for anything "serious" or part time... but it means that everyone - if they bother to tell me anything - tell me I'm over qualified as they move on to the next applicant..*sigh*)
Anyway.. for the time being, I'm trying to keep myself entertained by watching a lot of movies, trying to eat well, and attempting to poke around in my long ago past so I can remember names of the kids in my old elementary school class photos.. :)

soap box moment

I was reading about this thing that Obama has promised to sign into legislation as
soon as he's sworn in.  This is a nasty piece of work.  It would allow full term and
partial birth abortions, and if one of these children were to actually survive
the procedure, they would be set aside and ignored. Simply allowed to suffer until
they died.
This is an especially horrible thing to me as I so desperately want a child and am
one of the thousands of women in this country who are not able to have children of
our own.  Please sign this petition to change Obama's mind, and if you, or anyone
you know is ever in a position where this is something you find yourself, or a friend
considering, please stop and remember there are lots of us out here who would just
love to bring a child into our homes.

******* Forward this Message *******

Dear Friend,

I'm writing to let you know about a terrible piece of legislation called "The
Freedom of Choice Act" (FOCA).

FOCA would establish the right to abortion as a fundamental right (like the
right to free speech) and wipe away every restriction on abortion nationwide.

It will eradicate state and federal abortion laws that the majority of
Americans support and prevent states from enacting similar protective measures
in the future.

Please read the expert analysis by Americans United for Life (AUL) and sign the
Fight FOCA petition at:
http://www.FightFOCA.com

Thank you!

fostering update

Things had ben going very well. Ok, was still too darn cold and my truck still didn't much want to start (has warmed up today though, we're actually above 0 again..) but things had been going well.
Last wednesday I had finally gotten her home school material, and thursday we'd gotten started back in. We had appointments set for her and had found a way to get her excited about reading - which is the subject she has the most trouble with and hated doing..
Then friday night I got the call... they would be coming in about an hour to get her. OCS had decided she needed to be moved. All they would tell me was that it was "case related" and had nothing to do with me, but that I wasn't allowed to contact her mother about the move that night.
I know at least one of her siblings was also moved.
This has just devistated me. If I had had any doubts about my ability to handle fostering in general before, they were totally confirmed now. I simply can not deal with the seperation issues that can crop up. At least not right now. To get attached emotionally to a child that at any moment can be simply taken away.. I just can't deal with that.

2008 is gone- yay!! 2009 ???

Well, December is over at last... can't say that isn't a bad thing. As much as I love Christmas and had some nice plans for spending it by myself and popping around to vasious friends that had invited me over. It didn't work out that way.
I should, I suppose start at the beginning. The last few months of 2008 were really crazy for me, I spent a good solid month or more with a really nasty cold that kept coming back while i was trying to get things ready for my step kids to visit for Thanksgiving and get my husband all ready and packed for his year long military deployment. So we decided that I'd pretty much take off the month of December and not do anything around the house that didn't absolutely need to be done this month. That way I could spend the month just relaxing, which is an important thing for me. I've got seriously high blood pressure and I have to work hard to keep it as low as I can and lately, all the stress I've been under was a good part of why it was so high. So I was going to have a mini vacation and just live stress free.
I should have known better.
Things actually weren't too bad up until Christmas Eve. (Note: I live in Alaska and right now it is REALLY COLD!!!!! right now we're averaging about 20 below and it's been that way really since Christmas. The week before that we were averaging about 9 below. And it doesn't look to be getting any warmer for at least another week.) The morning of Christmas Eve I discovered that my basement had flooded due to a blockage in the septic lines. Most likely problem: ICE!!! Of course I couldn't get a plumber until Friday the 26th, so I lived without running water for 2 days.. It wasn't too bad that morning, but I went to a friend's for Christmas Eve dinner and when I got back realized I hadn't thought to unplug the water softner, which cycled while I was gone and seriously swamped me again, so I spent Christmas day mopping and cleaning. Not the fun, relaxing movie watching I'd hoped for. But the next day I got the plumber out and got it all taken care of, and right now I'm more careful and leave some warm water running overnight....
Thought that would be an end to it, no more little disasters...
Again, I should have known better...
New Years Eve day I decide I need to run to the post office, I have some letters I need to send and I need to be able to track them, so I bundle up and head out... No luck. Too cold, my truck won't start. I have been up here since 2003 and have never had a block heater on any of my cars. We'd talked about getting one on the truck, but ran out of time before my husband left, and then I was waiting til I had the money for it. Hopefully I can get in to get one sometime early this next week, but I've got to get it running again first. Actually had a neighbor come over and get it started on the 2nd, and it ran yesterday, but this morning, it decided it was too cold again. Which meant we couldn't go to Church today.
Oh yes, there's a "we" now, too.
Late afternoon on New Years day I got a phone call wanting to know if I would be willing to take in an 8 year old girl for up to 3 months. Her parents are getting a divorce because their father molested her older sister. There are 6 children total, the oldest is 12, the youngest is about 2. The girl I have with me is not aware of what her father did, but the kids were starting to act out and it was decided that it would be best if they all went to different homes for a little while. They will all be going to therapy and the plan is that over the next few weeks and months the kids will all be able to safely go back home.
We actually know this family pretty well, which is part of why I was asked to take one in. They wanted to lessen the seperation as much as they could so have placed everyone with people they already know. This is nice, I think, but means I'm waiting for Child Services to contact me so they can come inspect and approve me before we move the bulk of her stuff over here. So she moved into my step daughters' room, and once we get approval, I'll be getting her school work. She's homeschooled, so this will be interesting. Home schooling is something I haven't had that much interest in, and what little I ever did have, was greatly damaged when we tried homeschooling my stepson back in 2003 after he got himself expelled for being stupid. So this will be interesting.
As she will likely show up in some of these blogs, and I really don't want to post her personal information any more then I have to, I will give her a secret identity and, since she arrived in January, I will refer to her as Jan (which is no where near her real name...)

Anyway, this gave us a few answers to things, such as why I hadn't been able to find a job yet - I need to be home right now to take care of Jan while we're fostering her. Hopefully their counciling will go well and the family can all be united again soon. As I mentioned, we know the family quite well and this whole thing has just been a shock to everyone who knows them. Certainly never would have ever thought this sort of thing would happen there. This was a couple that had regular religious retreats where just the two of them would go away for a long weekend of spiritual renewal, scripture reading and romance. They adored each other. Just makes you wonder about the world.

Meanwhile.. for all my single male friends out there... I know of a soon to be single LDS female.. as long as you don't mind 6 kids (well, plus the 4 older fosters they raised...) :)